I’m going to be very vulnerable here. I started today off by trying to “plan” out my new year. What I think needs to happen and decisions I need to make in 2020 to insure that this year will be the best yet. I began to get so overwhelmed and even hopeless as I thought of how much I needed to get done and change (for those of you are a fan of the Enneagram, yes I am a one). I even began the comparison game again that I tried so hard in 2019 to overcome. Let me tell you that resisting the urge to compare your life with everyone else’s is not something that you can just overcome. It is a daily reset in the mind. You have to wake up and choose to be thankful and content with the current situation and believe that God is going to give you what you need for the day.
I was allowing the enemy to invade my thoughts again trying to convince me that I needed more physical things out of the life I already have. That these things would ultimately make me happy. Maybe part of this was the post Christmas blues after the hype of all the family time and fun. Regardless, I was sinking into a depressive post Christmas state. I thought the new year was supposed to be a start to a new beginning and here I was over analyzing all of my problems trying to find solutions around them that would be a quick fix.
I was checked in my spirit when I saw a post from @mrsbrittanylouu. She and her husband were baptizing someone in what looked like the backyard of their home. I was so convicted in my spirit. Here I was thinking that my backyard was too small for little O to run in and we needed a new house to fix that and she was using her backyard to help lead someone to Christ! I am crying just typing this because I realize that my priorities are all wrong. What matters most in this life and for this new year is people. It’s the family that we live under the same roof as that we need to cultivate and build the most loving and kind relationships with. It is other people around us at our jobs and in our neighborhoods that need us to share the Gospel with them. Loving others and making intentional efforts to share the love of Christ with them is what matters most in this life and year. It’s not the better income or a different home that matters most, It is what God has already given to us; beautiful people to share life with. So here is to shifting my perspective and seeking first the Kingdom of God this year (Matthew 6:33) and here is to accomplishing that by living out Matthew 28:19-20.
I want God to do amazing things in 2020. I know He is calling me to greater faith, trust, and rest and I will write more about that in a later post. However, for now through this beautiful act of a wonderful woman of God on Instagram, I realized that this is what 2020 needs to be about. It needs to be about a shift in perspective on what matters most and going after that with the tools God has given me. It needs to be letting go of trying to figure everything out and just love. Love God and love people.